The Joys and Complexities of Sibling Relationships

Relationships between brothers and sisters have often been called life's most influential and longest lasting relationships-lasting longer than ties to parents, spouses, or children (Bank & Kahn, 1997). Folk stories, biblical and classical literature, and numerous biographical and autobiographical accounts of childhood have focused on the role siblings play in children's development. Beginning in the 1980s, the influence of sibling relationships has received attention from developmental psychologists, researchers, and clinicians (Boer & Dunn, 1992). What factors influence the relationship between siblings? Why are some relationships marked by affection and closeness and others by conflict and hostility?

he variability in sibling relationships results from a complex interplay of factors that include gender, temperament, age spacing, and birth order. Sibling relationships are also embedded in the family and influenced by parenting behaviors, marital quality, and family conflict (Boer & Dunn, 1992; Stoneman & Brody, 1993; Eisenberg & Fabes, 1998). Although the research is not clear on what impact many of these variables have on brother and sister relationships, some effects appear with notable consistency. Among them is the role of the emotional climate of the family-marital conflict and marital satisfaction-in sibling relationships. Sibling conflict appears to be more frequent among brothers and sisters from homes where there are high levels of conflict. When there is a high amount of marital discord, there tends to be a high amount of aggression among the children (Boer & Dunn, 1992; Patten, 2000). While a sibling relationship can become more intense when parental care is emotionally unfulfilling or unavailable, the intensified bond can either be helpful or harmful to the children's relationship, depending on the attitudes and behaviors of the parents and the personalities of the children (Bank & Kahn, 1997; Boer & Dunn, 1992). For example, if the parents are physically or emotionally unavailable to care for their children, an older sibling may assume the parenting role and work to bind brothers and sisters together as a family. While most people would not consider this to be the best family dynamic, it can be a successful option for keeping children together and the family intact...

CLICK TO VIEW FULL ARTICLE